Five

Oh, Lila.

You’re five today. FIVE. How is that possible??

It feels like just yesterday that I was an all-knowing soon-to-be mom who eschewed the thoughts that my house would someday be overrun with brightly colored plastic and tape adhesive all over my walls from your art projects. Yet, here we are. I haven’t given in to the minivan yet (well, we did once, but that’s another blog post altogether!), but I’ve let you overtake my once reasonably well-styled living room with your Barbie Dream House and princess dresses. With your countless papers with the names of our family members on it, your ever-growing shoe collection, evidence of your constant costume changes. Which are now mixed in with small dinosaurs and trucks belonging to your little brother, but you still make it known who’s in charge (for now, anyway).

I’ve written the posts recapping your days in the NICU. Talked about how we weren’t sure if you were coming home with us, or when, or what troubles you would have growing up. I’ve shown those photos, with the wires all over you, the IV in your arm (or head), how swollen you were.

Today, I’m choosing to celebrate you. To push past those dark thoughts of “what if”, and remember how amazing you are. You changed our lives, little girl, for the better. You made me a better mom. One I didn’t even realize I wanted to be. I love seeing the world through your eyes, experiencing the joy you find in little things, like when you realized I secretly downloaded Frozen onto the ipad last night. I can’t wait for when you find a 3 foot tall inflated Olaf waiting to greet you in the living room when you come downstairs this morning.

Happy 5th birthday, Lila Bean. Try not to grow up TOO fast – but feel free to stop thinking the word “toilet” is so hilarious anytime now.

Love you, sweet girl.

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